How to Choose Your Bridesmaids

Clearly, the women who stand beside you as you make a lifelong commitment to your husband are important. But how do you go about choosing those select few bridesmaids? Here are some tips that worked for me for the big day.

1) Who knows you on your worst days?

You know those friends who have eaten through a tub of cookie dough with you. Not the cookies, people… we’re talking straight up DOUGH. We don’t mess with the silly rolls, either; we go straight for the bulk tub that’s clearly labeled not to eat raw. {Who do they think they’re kidding?} Yes. Those girls have seen the zits that resulted and don’t care. They love you through the dough times.

2) Who laughs at the same jokes as you?

If you can look at each other in a meeting when you know you’re supposed to be quiet (e.g. Church or a Sorority Chapter meeting) and snicker until you have tears over someone’s pronunciation of “thirdly”, that’s when you know you have a keeper. Also, this person is well-known for turning around in study hall with chocolate ALL OVER their teeth and whispering, “Do I have anything in my teeth?”. These are my people. 

3) Who has the potential to completely hold you up when you lose it?

Oh, this is a good one. We all have those friends who excel under pressure, who make it happen when everyone else is falling apart. When the prep room at my wedding was locked- LOCKED- we hauled our cookies all the way across the parking lot {in my DRESS while people were showing up!} and took pictures with a Sunday School chalkboard behind us. And I kept my cool- only because of my girls.

4) Who can recall many, MANY stupid things you’ve done, but loves you anyway?

Those friends from elementary, middle or high school who have seen you through it all. They know about that time you dropped half your overall straps in the toilet and they helped you dry it in the bathroom. {Overalls were cool in the 90’s y’all!} They remember when you put paperclips on your teeth to pretend you had braces. You’ve passed notes, driver’s license tests and exams together. Yep. They’re bridesmaid material.

5) Who’s family?

They’re the ones that you sit with every Thanksgiving- because even if you will ALWAYS be at the kids table, you have a great time because they’re there, too. Fold out table, paper plates, crazy uncles and all- they know where you’re from and love you anyway.

6) Who held your hair when you threw up at a fraternity party?

No stories needed here. This is *purely* hypothetical. *ahem*

7) Who brought you to Jesus when you needed Him most?

Oh these girls are love. LOVE, y’all. And full of grace. May be know them, be them and have them surround us.

8) Who could you not do it without?

You know your back up, your first call for “what are you wearing tonight”? This is the friend who you text with so much that you don’t have to transition- you just know you’re on to a different topic and you both get it. They get you. And you couldn’t do it without them.

These are the girls that you love. They all play different parts in different times of your life, but for that moment, you are surrounded by the best friends you’ll ever have. And if you’re lucky, they’ll bring the tub of cookie dough.

Here’s a key for my amazing bridesmaids (and many play several roles). Love them all dearly STILL! Mainly because they know too much about me. 😉

bridesmaid pic with labels


*All images from Art Solomon Photography, April 2001.

Fourteen + years and (cough cough) pounds ago…

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